Today is my 25th Birthday. It's quite a shock, honestly. When people ask my age, I immediate think "23" and have to remind myself that I'm actually 24. I mean, 25.
But on my birthday, I like to take stock of my life, look back on my year, where I've been and where I'm heading.
Ironically, last year, I thought life couldn't get any worse. But it did. It got really bad for awhile; I descended to a place lower than I ever thought possible. Funny how life has a way of coming back again, no matter how badly you think it's gone for good. I'm recovering, I'm writing, I'm smiling, I'm even laughing. I can look at life head-on again, even though I'm not sure where it's taking me.
And once again, I find myself profoundly amazed at the people in my life. My friends and my lover pulled me up and out, bolstered me on their shoulders and carried me through the most isolating grief I've will ever experience. And they still love me. Even more amazing, they still listen. I can never thank them enough. Words do not do my emotions justice---they never had. You know who you are. I love you.
So life has come back, indeed. I'm five months away from wedded bliss. I'm with a man who loves me, despite my flaws. I'm learning an intimacy so deep, I never imagined the possibilities. And so, once again, I find myself learning.
On this note, my yearly horoscope from the Washington Post:
TODAY'S BIRTHDAY (December 1). This year, you'll experience a brightening and lightening phenomenon that perks up every corner of your life. You are learning how to communicate with clarity. Business arrangements are far more creative and interesting than they were last year -- finances reflect the improved situation. There are many happy times ahead with Taurus and Pisces.
Duly noted. Life can only get better from here. Bring it on!
Thursday, December 01, 2005
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