Saturday, November 06, 2010

If I Was Stronger Than I

Five years ago, I began a healing process from an experience that forever has altered the course of my life, both emotionally and physically. Although it has been five years and I have found peace, my soul still searches for sunshine and forgiveness on this day.

Last year, on this day, another life-changing experience occurred. I am still struggling with the ramifications of another's betrayal, still working to trust, to forgive even when I know I don't deserve to ask for it. I don't know if I will come out of this experience intact as a person whole.

How does one piece this puzzle back together? How do you move forward if you aren't even certain that moving forward is what should happen? How does one even decide to contemplate making a choice?

If I was stronger then I'd decide to make that choice. But instead, I'm stalled out like a car on the side of the freeway, just sitting on the exit ramp, holding a discourse alone in my head.


Anonymous said...

umm so I read the last few of your posts before I commented on your October post. All of it was gathered together in my thoughts.

bleach cosplay said...

your blog is one of the first out of the few that i really enjoyed. (:

heart rumbles said...

These could be my own ramblings.Torn as I try to work it out. I appreciated what I have read so far. I will be back. Stop by sometime and read some of my poetry.